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The majority of my divorced clients, most of whom were married for 15-25 years, quickly discover that the modern dating scene is very different from what they once remember.
Add to this, that many divorcees admit they never really “dated” much before getting married, and so post-divorce they also find themselves having to how to date.
I share this now with a light heart, because five years after my separation, I have “acclimatized” and have since happily dated middle-aged men, many of whom are divorced and have children.
In other words, my dating pool didn’t change, I did.
It’s like telling yourself you’re prepared and ready for anything,” say Kylie & Jonathan.
Also make sure to keep on top of your hair and make-up.
Kylie & Jonathan, founders of KYJO, a Toronto-based style and image boutique, say that there is actually very compelling research to support the ‘look good/feel good’ claim.
In many cases, divorced women who are starting to date experience two processes simultaneously – on the one hand, they may still be recovering from an ended marriage (this can a long time, and is natural,) while on the other hand, they are ready to move forward, date and embrace their new singleness.
And so, as hard as it is to have a relationship end (even when it’s for good reasons) having the opportunity to date to find a new partner who may be a much better match can be a wonderful thing.
Add to this, that most older women would say they know themselves better, have developed better relationship skills, and are more established in their careers.
Finding yourself single and dating again after a divorce will require you getting used to your “new reality.” You are older, your body may be a little (or a lot) different than it was the last time you were dating, you may have “baggage” (exes, children, etc.) – and so will the men you will be dating!
For many people (myself included) getting used to your new reality, what I now call “acclimatizing,” can take some time.