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I recommend checking out Nihal’s discussion on the BBC especially starting at around into the show if you don’t have time to listen to the whole thing.One caller named Jasminder asserts that when Param came down, it became more like a comedy show and less like a dating show given how the women and audience reacted. He continues that turban-wearing men often feel invisible to women, not literally, but “when it comes to actually going out with someone.” I was inundated with the voices of young women in my school casually referring to facial hair as gross or unattractive (with no intention to hurt my feelings I’m sure) and their preference for guys who were “clean-shaven.” CLEAN-shaven. These are the messages we get from our peers and from the media every day.My parents were divorced and the family had moved to London by the time, aged 21, I met the man I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.If her dad says no, you need to respect his right over her and end it.A young Singh in the UK has been in the spotlight the last few days after his appearance on a dating television show called “Take Me Out.” I just heard about it a show on BBC Radio 1 hosted by Nihal, which you can listen to in its entirety here. Nihal speaks with Param, the dating show contestant, and takes comments from listeners, who discuss Param’s appearance on the show and more generally whether turban-wearing Sikh men are discriminated against when it comes to dating and marriage.As you’ll see in the clip below, as soon as Param comes out, 20 of the 30 women turn their lights off, indicating no interest in him. One woman who left her light on said she is interested in him because she could use Param’s turban to store her phone.The discussion on the BBC program resonated with many thoughts and questions that often swirl around in my head when it comes to the topic of dating for me, and perhaps other turban-wearing Sikh males:  Feeling like an outcast for most of one’s life most certainly takes a toll, even if the ways it manifests are more subtle in our adulthood.

It’s hard to say exactly what this is about and how much of it relates to this trend, but it is worth noting.

Of course, many would never consider dating me/us as a result.

I’ve found that many people, even South Asians and people from Sikh backgrounds, make all sorts of assumptions as soon as they see my khuli dhari and my turban, especially if they also learn I don’t drink.

This is to say, of course, that many people indeed do find dharis — even khuli dharis — and paghs attractive.

My friend has an interesting opinion on the matter: My parents have modernised a bit and would want to me to date before I committed any further but saying that, the pressure is still there to move faster rather then slower.

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